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My sister, Cindy, in 1979
at the "orchid capital" of the Pacific Northwest
on Vashon Island, Washington. |
An excerpt
from the upcoming book,
Who
Killed My Sister, My Friend by Melanie Hack
I knew
I would be publishing this story one day because of a dream...
...I am
walking under a canopy of branches and heading down some stone steps
that are cool to the touch, until I arrive upon a breathtaking beach.
On this sweltering summer day I seem to have found my perfectly secluded
spot.
Stepping onto the hot sand, I am mesmerized by the ocean's waves licking
the shore. My tongue detects salt in the air. The magical pan flute
of Zamfir tickles the hair in my ears. I hum along.
Looking
far to my right, I see someone already soaking up my perfect day.
She is reading a book while lying on a fuzzy purple beach towel large
enough for two people.
She is
alone.
There
is something familiar about her and curiosity draws me closer.
It does
not come as a surprise that it is my dead sister, Cindy. She looks
radiant. She is so engrossed in a fascinating book that she does not
take notice of me until I am right beside her. She calmly lays the
book down, turns her eyes to me, and smiles an approving smile. As
soon as I glance at the book I know immediately what I will do one
day. The book she is reading is called My Sister, My Friend
- and I, Melanie Hack, am its author.
She wants
this story, this incredible mystery that was her life, shared.
And she
wants me to write it. Realizing all stories without an end never go
away, I understand the message veiled in her eyes. It relates to how
she wrote on 2 June 1988, almost exactly one year prior to her body
being found, "I feel a strong need for justice that I have to
accept will never occur."
For much
of seven years starting in 1982, the life of my oldest sister, Cindy
James, was a living hell, as though she were trapped in a horror novel
from which there was no escape, except in death—but this was
real. She suffered more than most of us will ever experience.
“I
have been tormented and harassed by someone who knows me well enough
to know what will really hurt me,” she wrote of her living nightmare.
She endured
seven major physical assaults including kidnapping and several attempted
murders, had her arms tied up tightly behind her and electrical tape
sealed over her mouth, was injected with drugs, held at knife point,
slashed, stabbed, sexually violated, and, time after time, strangled
to near death with black nylon pantyhose. In addition, she was the
object of harassment that included obscene and threatening phone calls,
letters and notes made of words cut from newspaper, messages left
on her car windshield with a picture of a covered corpse being wheeled
into a morgue on a stretcher; raw meat delivered and dead cats left
in and around her house—some with string around their necks
and a note nearby saying, “You’re next”; damage
to her property—broken windows, a slashed pillow, cut phone
wires, and arson. Even her beloved dog, Heidi, had been found shaking
with fright and sitting in her own feces, allegedly with cord wound
tightly around her neck. The harassment would appear to cease for
brief periods, then return, so Cindy never knew when something horrible
would happen, so she had to be constantly alert, careful and watchful.
In her journal she screamed at God, “How could you let this
go on?” but he never heard her, or, she guessed, he never cared.
During
those seven years Cindy changed her name, repainted her car a different
color, moved many times, and hired a private investigator she could
hardly afford, who installed a two-way radio, alarms, and strong back
porch lights at her home plus gave her an electronic “panic
button”. Cindy endured polygraph tests that were scientifically
unreliable due to her traumatized state. She tolerated hours of stressful
and draining hypnosis sessions where she recounted and relived horrific
visions in an attempt to share information that her attack-induced
amnesia had kept hidden. And she suffered great emotional anguish
from the resulting flashbacks and nightmares and became tense and
afraid those nightmares or memories would overwhelm her.
Eventually
Cindy’s constant tension led to exhaustion, depression and suicidal
thoughts. She suffered a mental breakdown in 1985 that led to a brief
hospital stay, although I didn’t know about it at the time.
In 1986 she needed more medical intervention when she tried to starve
herself to death after a fire destroyed her downstairs rec room and
jeopardized the lives of her friends who were staying with her. That
time she was in the hospital for months and I was concerned about
how the harassment had led her to give up on life. Later I would hear
and read the opinions of the doctors at the time, and how some had
made snap judgments about her and didn’t take her harassment
seriously. While I lived life oblivious to the broader picture, Cindy
was bathed in doubt, humiliation and fear.
Fear was
her constant companion. By June 15, 1988, Cindy was feeling a difference
in her thinking, was easily distracted, and began to wonder if she
had been brain-damaged by the assaults, especially the attempted strangling.
With professional therapy she fought valiantly to be a survivor, not
a victim. Because she was a private and proud individual, I did not
have extensive knowledge, until much later, of most of the atrocities
inflicted upon her. Over the years I was only given enough sketchy
details of her harassment to make me wonder what was really going
on. She sadly believed that others had enough problems in their own
lives and did not need to be burdened with hers. To her journal she
shared how vivid images of some of the more frightening things she
could not talk about left her feeling “so alone … no one
in the universe will ever understand … like I somehow live on
a different planet from everyone else. Like I’m existing alongside
them but always separate.”
During
those seven years many theories developed about what was actually
going on in Cindy’s world. Her friends, family, co-workers and
private investigator believed she was being stalked and tormented
by someone adept at covering his tracks—a stranger or clever
sadist, or perhaps her ex-husband, Roy, maybe desperate to have her
back after she left him. Roy believed the Mafia was harassing Cindy,
or at the least, someone hired by a disgruntled parent at Cindy’s
workplace. Ozzie Kaban, whom Cindy hired to provide security, would
throw out the idea that maybe Roy was trying to drive his client crazy.
Even the police thought Roy was the major suspect for almost five
of those seven years although briefly turning their suspicion to a
fellow police officer, Pat McBride. And early on, within the policing
community, some officers doubted Cindy’s tales of terror, believing
she was doing it to herself. Some people even speculated Ozzie was
involved somehow; maybe he had been drawn into her web and began assisting
her or covering up for her. Or maybe it was a combination of possibilities.
Although
the evidence was contradictory, confusing and incomplete, the police
ultimately believed Cindy was knowingly behind her own harassment,
while Roy came to believe Cindy was a multiple personality, unaware
she was tormenting herself. Even the doctors pulled into Cindy’s
world had varying opinions. And as the evidence slowly unfolded for
me, my thoughts and beliefs played a game of ping-pong, going back
and forth over the possibilities, desperate for an answer. It seemed
almost any scenario was possible, but one truth emerged:
Appearing
cloaked in a world of fear and loneliness, Cindy endured harassment—until
she disappeared for the last time.
I offer
you a compelling true story, almost unbelievable in it's complexity-the
mysterious death of Richmond nurse, Cindy James.
This is
the timeless tale of a tragedy that unfolded over seven years of attacks
and harassment by an unknown perpetrator. Her violent death - far
from offering closure - was only the beginning of an agonozing journey
through layers of family secrets, official negligence, and conflicting
stories.
Grief
bruises are vividly painted as this book journeys through the bowels
of hell. You will come to know the stench of loss and the struggle
of surviving.
In searching
for an understanding of Cindy's mysterious death and how society failed
her, a powerful message unfolds for all of us.
Join the list
of people wishing to read this story when published. Thank you for
your support. Melanie
Your
email will not be sold, traded or shared.
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