The day before my father passed away he pulled me onto the bed with him and hugged me hard saying, “You need to understand.”

I wasn’t sure specifically what he was referring to but I had several good ideas and all of them deserved a response from me of, “It’s OK Dad. I do understand.”

I sensed he was trying to tell me that he was indeed in the irreversible process of dying and he wanted to let me know that he loved me very deeply and he wanted to be sure that I was OK…and that I would be all right after he died. Perhaps he needed to know that I was ready for what was to happen.

And I suspected he wanted to make sure I would take care of my mother.

So I reassured him that I understood his struggle, and I told him once again that I loved him and that it was OK for him to be letting go.

I miss you Dad. And on some days, like this past Remembrance Day, it hits me harder than on other days.

Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My Friend
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