I’ve discovered there are lots of ways to remember a loved one during the holiday season. You could:

Light a candle or a Hospice tree during their “Tree of Lights” event.

Hang a special ornament to honor a deceased loved one—an ornament that had special meaning for your beloved…or one that you made yourself (or perhaps one made together).

Hang a special stocking or have available a decorated box (similar to a ballot box with a slot in the top) and ask family members and friends to write a note or insert a special memento that reminds them of a favorite story or memory about the deceased…and then when everyone is gathered to open their gifts on Christmas day, (or maybe on Christmas Eve when the tree is lit and everyone is enjoying togetherness; any special time during the holidays), read the notes one by one and share the stories and memories associated with the mementos.

Among the holiday decorations, create a sacred space (like an alter) with your beloved’s photo along with other special items…candles, flowers, incense, music, personal items from friends and family…and use it as a place for meditation, prayer, blessings or gratitude. Make it eye appealing, comfortable and meaningful to you. (Included in my sacred space is a water fountain with polished rocks that have special meaning.) Remember, it doesn’t have to be elaborate…it can be simple—as long as it holds special meaning for you!

Listen to your loved one’s favorite music or sing their favorite Christmas carol.

Set a place for your beloved at the Christmas table and cook extra food (including your beloved’s favorite dish)…but take the food to a homeless person or to someone who is alone for the holidays—or better yet, invite them to dine with you at your place!

At the start of your meal say a prayer and take a moment to remember your beloved.

Practice random acts of kindness and create a legacy of love in remembrance of your loved one…for instance take gifts to a children’s hospital.

What do you like to do?

In another Blog post I’ll share more ideas for random kind acts.

Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
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