Patrick Mathieu (seen in the above photo) is a walking miracle.
He was born with a “bad” heart—it had, and still has, a hole! –A big hole!
When he was 18-years-old he was told, considering his defect, he MIGHT live to 30…if he was lucky! Guess what…he’s well into his 30’s…and living strong…with eyes wide open!
And he’s teaching others how to really live…how to make the most out of TODAY…how to live without regret and without fear!
He points out the fact that we all have an expiry date. And the sooner you embrace that realization, the more powerful your life will become.
His Blog is packed full of interesting posts like:
“Goodbyes” –think of someone dear to you and imagine this is your last time with them…he asks you questions to follow through on that train of thought;
“Well When You Put It That Way” –where he has you looking at your life as a series of months…
And he has videos.
He challenges you to “tip the balance to the positive side for a change” –I won’t tell you what that is…you can read about that in his post, “Be The Tipping Point.”
Patrick, you are an inspiration to us all!
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
Remember:
Learn to laugh at yourself.
Learn to help others laugh.
Learn to laugh when you are up.
Learn to laugh when you are down.
Learn to laugh.
~Charlie “Tremendous” Jones
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
“I’ve lived my life according to experiences, so I think I’m about 18 hundred years old,” said Charlie “Tremendous” Jones in July. “I’ve had 81 fantastic years,” he said, “And I’m tired.” With family members at his side, Charlie succumbed to his inoperable lung tumor and “triumphantly entered the gates of Heaven” at 4pm, October 16, 2008…one week shy of his 81st birthday.
In case you don’t know who “Tremendous” Charlie is…he’s the guy who said the secret of success is learning to be thankful…and he passionately promoted the reading, sharing and discussion of books. He so strongly believed a book could turn and shape a person’s life that he literally gave away tens of thousands of books! –His dream was to impact many lives.
Well Charlie impacted my life…not because of a book…but because of his words. A little over a year after Cindy died I went through a phase where I wanted to quit on life. It was as though the horror, the anguish, the fear, the hurt, the sadness, and all the pain that had accumulated over many years was finally crashing down around me as I read through the inquest’s exhibit evidence. I wanted to be in a shell to protect myself, wanted to immobilize myself, but at the same time recognized that I didn’t want to do that anymore. And I desperately needed to understand what was happening to me. I needed to talk about my pain and fear and other thoughts with a trustworthy soul because I felt I was falling apart…I was suicidal—wanting to die yet not really wanting to die…wanting to end the pain…wanting to escape…wanting to get relief. Through talking and sharing I was relieved to discover just how “normal” I actually was within the grief process. (And it’s been my experience through my Hospice work since then that ‘wanting to quit’ is a common thought within people on the road to healing in mourning.)
Charlie said, “There is a tremendous difference between wanting to quit and actually quitting. Sometimes you want to quit, but just because you want to quit doesn’t mean that you have to quit. A lot of people are afraid to want to quit because they are also afraid that they WILL quit. The secret is to accept that you want to quit, but realize and make up your mind that you will NEVER quit. Once you make up your mind to never quit until you’ve finished a task, then you can enjoy wanting to quit because you know in your heart that you never actually will quit.”
Well, Charlie, I didn’t quit. In fact I poured all my heart and soul into writing my book Who Killed My Sister, My Friend so that others might have the opportunity to turn and shape their lives by knowing they are not alone in pain.
People do care!
And peace is possible.
Thank you for being an inspiration for so many!
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
Have you found joy in your life?
Has your life brought joy to others?
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
A Facebook friend, Amy, recently touched my heart:
“Hey, Melanie. I was in the old neighborhood today paying tribute to the passing of my wonderful old friend (yup, one in the same from the story I told you about from when we were 13, unfortunately). Anyways, as I was memorializing him in all our old haunts, I decided to bring a flower from his building and lay it down with a note in tribute to Cindy as well, in roughly that same spot. It just seemed appropriate and I also took a photo/video of it, but I thought I should let you know. May both of their spirits be at peace.”
(If you follow the link in the above paragraph you’ll learn what Amy and her now deceased friend had done so many years ago in the neighborhood where Cindy’s body was found.)
I thought it was a great idea for Amy to memorialize her friend in all the places they used to visit/hang out/play, and to write a note and place a flower…and I was touched that she also thought of Cindy. And I wanted to share her great idea with you (in case you might be interested in doing the same thing for your deceased beloved)!
Those pictures you see in this Blog post are ones Amy generously sent. And for clarification she added:
“And the note, in case it isn’t clear enough to read said:
‘For Cindy J.
We cared.
And we believed you.’
Then I wrote our initials/dates we were there at the bottom and ‘may you rest in peace.’ I left in a gazebo kind of close to where the old house was and it seemed a nice place to lay the flower/note.”
And for Amy, her tribute was a stepping-stone on her healing journey:
“I think the day of remembering and leaving notes all over town in special places we went really helped with closure/letting go a bit. … It was all very impromptu, but it came straight from the heart. :-)”
~Amy
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
“He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words.”
~Elbert Green Hubbard (American writer, publisher, artist, and philosopher.)
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
For Canadian Thanksgiving, a friend recently sent the following message…words from Mother Teresa:
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self- centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of having selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, others may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do it anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It never was between you and them . . . anyway.
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
“When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.”
~Franklin Roosevelt
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
As I mentioned in my previous Blog post, in the recent economic downturn many citizens are suffering. They are angry and sad and frustrated and worried and tired…! Many have put off their dreams for a few years for when they are sitting better financially, and the country is better.
Yes…even I’ve made some changes in my life to de-stress!
So, what are the things you can do now that will help you feel less stressed?
Exercise—physical activity is one of the most effective stress remedies around because it helps you to work off your anger and frustration…even simply walking! I try to go for a walk every morning when my children head off to school. It’s invigorating and refreshing, and I feel so much better afterwards! But of course there are many physical activities you can choose from that work best for you.
Or you can use relaxation techniques—yoga, meditation, stretching, deep breathing, or massage (your partner will love this one).
And watch your diet—alcohol, caffeine, sugar, fats and tobacco all put a strain on your body’s ability to cope with stress.
Try talking with others—you will relieve stress by venting your feelings and if you ask, you might get suggestions for solutions. Try to pinpoint your concerns and help yourself find realistic solutions you can achieve in steps that will bring success.
And get enough rest and sleep…I know, sometimes that’s easier said than done, but try!
Tackle one thing at a time—Don’t try to do too much at once. And try not to be too hard on yourself.
And don’t panic!
Remember…seek professional help if you need to.
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James
Stock markets have plunged and are bouncing around, people have seen their retirement funds and their children’s education savings drastically decline, house prices are falling, many mortgages are due for refinancing, jobs are being cut, groceries cost more…
Maybe the economic downturn hasn’t affected your pocketbook…yet, but you could still be feeling the symptoms of stress. (A recent American survey suggests 8 out of 10 people are feeling stress and worry over money. And some people are scared to death!)
Although across the border in Canada the crisis isn’t as bad, many people are uncertain about the future…and even the next day! And around the world there is concern about a global recession.
Add to that the stress of coping with the death of a loved one and you may be sitting there and saying, “What am I going to do next? How am I going to get through this?”
The negative effects of too much stress associated with being under pressure can affect your health. In fact, severe stress can cause biochemical changes in your body, affecting your immune system and leaving your body vulnerable to disease!
Yikes!
So what can you do?
Start thinking about what you can do to relieve the problem.
Take control over the issues you can manage.
And come up with a good action plan taking some steps. –Maybe that means cutting back on extras for the time being, or simplifying your life, or making different financial decisions and day-to-day changes.
In my next Blog post I’ll talk about specific de-stressing strategies that can be done immediately to bring you some relief.
Melanie Hack
Author of Who Killed My Sister, My friend
Read an excerpt now
TV Shows and Clips about the Death of Cindy James